A Simple Spring: A Seasons of Lancaster Novel Read online

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  “The kind that makes your pulse race. The adrenaline rush that keeps you up all night, just thinking about him?”

  “The Big Love that God gives you so you know that this is the man you want to spend the rest of your life with?”

  Remy drew a deep breath and closed her eyes. “It happened during the snowstorm, but it was subtle. It crept up on me when I least expected it. One minute he was sending me home on an icy road. I thought he couldn’t stand to be near me. And then, over the next few days … I began to realize that my life would feel hollow and incomplete without him. I couldn’t help but see how much love Adam had for everyone. He was so good at taking care of the farm, and you and your brothers and sisters. He seems tough and distant sometimes, but when you get past the macho patriarch thing he’s the kindest person I know.”

  Sadie listened carefully. Her brother Adam sounded ever so different when Remy described him. Did Remy truly see such warmth in the brother who sought to keep her on the family farm, the one who was disappointed in her for choosing to stay in her rumspringa one more year? She was glad Remy loved Adam, but it just showed how God had a very different plan for everyone under the sun.

  “So you found the Big Love,” Sadie said. “And you decided to stay, even though Adam was responsible for his ten brothers and sisters and a dairy farm.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Remy’s green eyes sparkled when she smiled. “That was the bonus! I have always wanted a big family, but eleven! It’s better than my wildest daydreams. Being a part of your family is such a blessing for me, and after years of kicking around with no strong family ties, it’s so good to have a home.”

  To hear Remy talk of her love for Adam made Sadie that much more sure that the Big Love had not happened for her yet. She didn’t feel so hollow without Frank … at least, not now.

  She would have to wait and be patient. Patience was a virtue, Mamm used to say, though it never came easily to Sadie.

  PART TWO

  Listen to Your Heart

  “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”

  —JAMES 1:17

  ALMOST!

  Within my reach!

  I could have touched!

  I might have chanced that way!

  Soft sauntered through the village,

  Sauntered as soft away!

  So unsuspected violets

  Within the fields lie low,

  Too late for striving fingers

  That passed, an hour ago.

  —EMILY DICKINSON

  SEVENTEEN

  June

  Although it was evening, the orange sun still hung in the red and lavender sky and heat waves shimmered over the blacktopped roadway as Sadie scootered down the hill, headed toward Halfway. Her dress and apron were stashed in the scooter’s basket, but even in her T-shirt and jeans, sweat beaded on her upper lip. If it was this hot the second day in June, it was going to be a scorching summer.

  A ribbon of guilt tightened in her chest when she thought of leaving Remy and Mary behind with the laundry and dinner to prepare. Sure, they believed she was going off to her job in the hotel, but with all the work to be done in summer, it was hard to get away from the farm. They had already put up berry jams, but with the garden overflowing with fat cucumbers, early peaches and plums, and asparagus, someone needed to work the roadside stand to sell off the extras.

  But even with all her responsibilities, the promise of music tugged at her, and it was a pleasure she couldn’t resist.

  Her cell phone vibrated in her pocket, and Sadie scraped one foot over the pavement to stop and fish it out. She smiled when she saw the caller ID.

  “Mike! You caught me at the right time. I’m just on my way into town.”

  “On your scooter,” he said. “No doubt racing a team of draft horses.”

  She laughed. “I do like to go fast.”

  “You’re a tough person to reach.”

  “I know, but I have to leave my phone off at home. The reception is bad, and if I’m not careful it runs out of battery completely.” These days she charged her phone during band practice, and Red didn’t seem to mind at all.

  “How is your grandmother?” Mike had told her about Katherine Trueherz’s stroke during one of their many conversations since they’d run into each other in Philly last week.

  “She’s making real progress, but she’s not quite steady enough on her feet to give up the wheelchair yet. The doctor said that part may take some time.”

  “God bless her. She must be happy to have you there with her.”

  “It’s worked out well. When the physical therapist and the aide are here, I’m off at the bakery, and I usually get home before Stella leaves.” Mike had gotten a summer job at a neighborhood bakery, which he was hoping to keep once he went back to school.

  “And did you bake something good today?” she teased, enjoying the easy exchange between them.

  “Rugelach. It’s dough rolled around chocolate and nuts.”

  “Mmm. Anything with chocolate and nuts must be good.”

  “I’ll have to bring you some when we get together,” he said.

  Her heart danced at the thought, even though she scolded herself as they ended the call. It was verhuddelt to think of spending time with Mike.

  They had been talking this week about meeting each other somewhere, and though Sadie wanted to see him, she knew it would be another black mark against her at home if her family learned she was making a new friend among the Englishers. Not that it was forbidden. Gott wanted His people to abide in faith, hope, and charity toward all mankind. But the brethren wouldn’t approve of Sadie expressing such interest in any form of the outside world, when her singing was already attracting a few suspicious looks.

  She felt sure the ministers knew nothing of the band, but sometimes she worried that word had leaked out that she’d lost her job at the hotel. Although she believed her sisters had kept her secret, she felt sure Adam knew she was dabbling in the Englisher world. He had seen her scootering off toward town instead of attending singings with the Amish young folk. Did he recognize the restlessness in her heart … the same bold spirit that had lured him away from home when he was around her age?

  Sometimes worry ached inside her, like a bad hangnail that throbbed at night. The more you prodded the cut, the worse it got, though you couldn’t help but twiddle the loose skin. Torn between her family and the call of Gott in her heart, she could see no proper ending that would make everyone happy.

  By the time she arrived at Red’s house, her mind was crowded with a jumble of thoughts. She parked her scooter by the side door of the garage, which was propped open to catch the breeze. Music streamed out from the open door. Swallowing back a touch of nerves, she smoothed down her T-shirt and wiped the sweat from her brows. She hadn’t seen Frank since she and Remy had transformed her eyebrows. What would he think? Would he even notice?

  “Hello?” she called, stepping into the open doorway.

  Red sat at his drum set, moving his sticks in time with a song playing from his iPod docking station.

  Frank was on the old flowered couch, staring at the large cell phone computer in his hand. “Hey, church girl,” he called without looking up. “You’ll be happy to know I’ve got a gig lined up for us. A real one.”

  Sadie paused a few feet away from him and hooked her thumbs into the pockets of her jeans. “Ya? When is that?”

  He looked up at her and suddenly the tension fell away from his face. Frank seemed to see her with new eyes. “This weekend.” He patted the couch beside him. “Come. Sit. That’s a new shirt, right? I like it.”

  “Thank you,” Sadie said, happy to see that light back in his eyes. It reminded her of the way he’d looked at her when he’d first heard her sing. “So … this Saturday. That would be exciting.”

  “Yeah.” He didn’t look away from her, even for his beloved cell phone. “I’m gl
ad we’re rehearsing today. It’s been almost a week, and we don’t want to get rusty.”

  “Sure.” She leaned back on the couch and his eyes followed her all the way.

  “Did you change your hair?” he asked.

  Sadie felt a slow smile of satisfaction warm her lips. He had noticed. “Frank …” She tugged on one of her kapp strings. “You know my hair and kapp are the same as ever.”

  He held up his hands and shrugged. “Whatever it is, you look great.”

  Tara arrived, and Frank and Sadie got to their feet to start setting up their instruments and the microphones. As she worked, Sadie thought it was a wonder what eyebrows could do for a girl. Of course, there had been a bit of trouble when she got home and her sisters had gaped at them. Adam had scowled with disapproval, though he’d kept mum. She had wondered if the plucking had been worth it. All that pain and the tears running down her cheeks. It had left her skin blotchy and red, though that had faded after the first day. But now, seeing the look on Frank’s face, Sadie knew it was all worth it.

  From the very first number, Frank praised Sadie’s part in every song. Odd, how the way she looked had sweetened him. She wasn’t singing any differently, but he liked her performance better.

  “Awesome, Sadie. I love the way you held back until the bridge,” Frank said.

  She nodded, not wanting to be proud, though his praise warmed her like sunshine slanting through the clouds.

  When they took a break, Frank invited her to sit beside him on the couch again. “We need to talk about our set list for Saturday.”

  She got a bottle of water from the fridge and sat down, thinking that Frank might be open to her suggestions on some new songs. How she’d love to try some of the wonderful good music that the choir singers had shared with her. In her mind, she could hear the melodic strains of “Be Thou My Vision.” That song made her heart soar whenever she heard it on her iPod. How she would love to share that experience with an audience!

  “I’ve been thinking that it would sound good if the band did something with harmonies,” Sadie said. “You and Tara could sing.” Although Red had a fine, deep voice, she had learned that it was difficult for a person to sing while working the drums.

  “That would take some doing,” Frank said, “and it sort of shifts the style of music away from what we’ve been practicing.”

  “That was another idea of mine … to try something new.” When Frank bit his lower lip in tension, Sadie turned to Red, who seemed interested. “I was thinking we could do some hymns. They’re so beautiful in harmony. Something like ‘Amazing Grace’ or ‘Be Thou My Vision.’ ”

  Frank’s face crumpled as if she’d hauled manure into the room. “That’s Christian music you’re talking about.”

  “What’s wrong with Christian music?” she asked.

  “Nothing, it’s just boring.”

  “Actually, Christian hymns are a part of our vast musical heritage,” Red pointed out. “Some religious hymns are ancient. Did you know the word comes from the Greek ‘hymnos’?”

  “Don’t start,” Frank whined.

  Sadie looked to Tara for more support, but the girl was collapsed on a chair, plucking out a melody on her bass. Her spirits sinking, she stared down at the floor. She knew her voice, and she was starting to learn a few things about music, too. Their band could do wonderful good things with a beautiful hymn, but Frank did not want to talk about it.

  “I think Sadie is on to something,” Red said calmly.

  Sadie straightened as hope rose inside her again at Red’s support. Frank’s moods never seemed to bother Red.

  Red tucked a strand of curly hair behind one ear. “Did you know that Van Morrison recorded a version of ‘Be Thou My Vision’? If you want, I’ll find it for you on YouTube.”

  “I would like to see that.” Red had shown Sadie videos on his computer before, and she’d been surprised to see how it worked like a little television.

  “And what about ‘Amazing Grace’?” Red added. “Any soloist worth his salt has covered that hymn. In the past decade, it’s become a sort of spiritual anthem for our nation.”

  Sadie nodded, awed by Red’s knowledge of music.

  “We need songs that entertain people,” Frank said, scratching his small beard. “We’re playing clubs, not churches.”

  “But part of entertaining involves pathos. Stirring the soul,” Red said. “I say we give it a shot. Sadie here is going to be rocking the hymn.”

  “It doesn’t hurt to try it, Frank.” Sadie felt a new strength solidify inside her.

  And Frank was coming around. “Maybe ‘Amazing Grace.’ We all know that one. But I’m not going to start learning church songs. We’re not a God Squad.”

  Red pointed out that every band member brought a unique motivation to the experience, but Sadie’s mind wandered from the conversation as hope swelled at the thought of sharing a song she so loved with Englishers.

  When they set up to try it, Red stood up from his stool and looked around the garage.

  “Hold on. I’m just looking for that old Wurlitzer. Where’d we stash it, Frank?”

  Frank rubbed his chin, considering. “I think it’s over by that furniture.”

  “There it is.” Red carried out a small keyboard on its own table.

  “It’s a little piano,” Sadie said.

  “Sort of.” Red set it beside the couch, plugged it in, then sat down and pressed into the keys. The instrument sounded like a piano in an empty barn with echoes. “I don’t think we’re going to need much percussion here,” Red said, “so I’ll give the Wurlitzer a shot.”

  Sweet notes wavered from Red’s little piano, and Sadie dug into the lush melody. “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound! That saved a wretch like me! I once was lost, but now am found, Was blind, but now I see.” When she started the second verse Red and Tara joined with sweet harmonies under her voice, and Sadie closed her eyes to escape into the song.

  “When we’ve been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun …” Sadie imagined God’s presence as a yellow ball of fire rising over the distant dark green hills, a sight she saw most mornings when she set out to begin her chores. How she longed to share the fresh cool dew on the grass, the smell of clover, or the surrounding chorus of birdsong with people who had never known such wonders.

  If she could bring these things to their audience, it would help her believe that God had meant this path for her. This was how she was supposed to share the light burning inside her.

  When the song ended, Sadie held the microphone to her heart and turned, gaping at the other band members. “Did you hear us?” She laughed. “We sounded good as any group on my iPod.”

  Red nodded, and Tara flashed an uncharacteristic smile.

  “It was good,” Frank admitted.

  “Good? We nailed it,” Red said, his hands poised over the piano keys. “We can keep the jazz and blues in our playlist, but that is our money song.”

  “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound! That saved a wretch like me …” Sadie was lost in the hymn, barely hearing Tara and Red’s harmonies behind her. The tingling sensation at the base of her neck told her that something special was happening here, and she began to see the song as a prayer to Gott, a prayer from the entire band and everyone in the club.

  The Saturday-night crowd had been loud and wild while they were setting up in the tavern. Not a very welcoming audience, and they had talked and laughed while the band had performed their first few numbers.

  But now, for their closing song, the patrons listened in silence as the band completed the last verse.

  “Was blind but now I see.”

  There was a twang of Frank’s guitar and the lingering notes of the little electric piano … then silence.

  Then a blast of noise as the crowd applauded and shouted and stomped their feet against the wooden floor.

  Sadie’s eyes opened to see people on their feet. A few young men stepped forward to high-five Frank, and Heathe
r and her friends were jumping up and down as they shouted Frank’s name.

  Frank bowed and then pointed to the rest of the band.

  “Thanks,” Red told the audience. “Thanks a lot.”

  Suddenly Frank grabbed Sadie’s microphone. “Thank you! We’re Amish Blues, and we hope to see you again soon!”

  Oh, not that name! Suddenly Sadie’s lovely floating cloud of joy sank down to earth at Frank’s announcement, and it brought back the memory of the poster she’d seen in the doorway of the club when they’d arrived that night. The bold advertisement had the words “Amish Blues” with a photo of an Amish girl in a kapp. Well, a profile shot. When she’d looked more closely, she’d seen that it was her—her photo taped up on the wall of a bar!

  She had wheeled toward Frank.

  “So I made some flyers,” he’d said. “It’s publicity for the band. You don’t have anything to worry about, church girl. See? It doesn’t show your face.” Frank was always telling her not to worry, but he didn’t understand the rules of the Ordnung or the things that were expected of you when you were Amish. He wasn’t always fair with her. She listened to him and tried to understand his hopes and dreams—his longing to make their band successful. But he was not mindful of the narrow path she walked so carefully to sing in the band and yet remain true to the things that really mattered to Plain folk. It was getting to be a problem with Frank, and she wasn’t sure what to do about it.

  The girls at the front tables cheered and squealed again amid dying applause, and suddenly bright flashes of light peppered the crowd.

  What was that? Sadie blinked from the bursts of light as she realized they were taking pictures of the band by holding up their cell phones.

  Immediately she put a hand up to cover her face, but by then it was too late. Her photograph had already been taken, more than once. Fear and shame burned her face as she turned to Frank for help.…

  But he had been swallowed up in the group of girls.

  “Frank?” she called to him.